To Curve Or Not To Curve...That Is The Question....

G Edwin Taylor made a comment yesterday that sparked a great deal of conversation. The essence of it was that woman with curves are appreciated by some men. I won't go into the details of the discussion as anyone can go look at it. What I wanted to do was document where it sent me on my mind quest yesterday.

It started with me wanting to show my trainer pictures of the "look" I was aiming for. I think Cowtown's Best Kept Secret has a lovely body and it's just the right balance of curve and health. I found some pics of ladies I like and was going to show him but a funny thing happened. He stopped me.

I don't want to see pictures...you are you and not someone else. (He said.)

Tell me, Do you like to exercise?

Yes.

Why?

Because it makes me feel good.

Good how?

Good...good strong...good competent...good pretty...good tall...good happy....just good.

So, you feel GOOD when you exercise?

Yes...

Do you like to run? Why?

I do...it's hard. I cry alot when I do. But when I do something I was afraid to do and have never done before...my pride soars and I feel SO good. Like I am Wonder Woman.

(You ARE Wonder Woman he says and presses his cheek to my temple).

How about lifting?

Oh! I adore lifting! I love it love it love it LOVE IT!

Why?

Because...because it's a focused effort. For that moment I can simply let the whole day fall away. I can just do and the feeling when I have moved that bar and accomplished that lift is just... I just want to beat my chest like Tarzan ...she giggles.

He smiles.

Would you ever enter a body building contest?

No...no. Why? Because it is about the look. The aesthetic. Its just a different type of beauty contest and beauty is in the eye of the beholder...there is no standard of beauty. And I don't like thinking I can loose because a judge's concept of beauty does not include me. Sure, you might win because those five people think you are hot but a different five might turn their nose up at you and you loose.

How about a power lifting competition?

Oh. Well. Blush and shy smile. Yes. I think I would after hearing you talk about it. Maybe...

He smiles. When you are ready. We still have alot of work to do. But, why?

Because it is or isn't. You are judged on your strength. You either do it or you don't. There is no aesthetic. You are judged on your accomplishment and power and strength and it's accurately measured against others. You can be ugly as all hell or gorgeous and it doesn't matter. All that matters is that you DO IT.

You know what I think, Miss Seven?

That we should go eat some cake?

Laughter.

I have a feeling I know but go ahead and say it anyway.

This is what I think. And you can agree or disagree but I think you will agree because I think I have gotten to know you pretty well.

Ok.

I think...we should do what we need to do. You like to work out. You like to lift. You like to run but it still scares you and is hard. I see how you simply GLOW after an hour of slinging some weight around. Others whine or fudge or go half ass but you never do. I give you 15 Single Leg Romanian Deadlifts and inevitably you do 23 because you say oh I didn't like that one it wasn't perfect enough do over. You wrinkle your nose at me and say to add MORE weight when you don't think its hard enough. I tell you you can stop and you push out two more just because you can. You are the only client I have to sit on sometimes because you push yourself so hard. When my other clients are whining about not feeling like a half hour on the treadmill I tell them about Josie who texts me at 1145 at night that she just finished running her C25K in 27 degree weather and she's sorry she cried through half of it but she finished.

I think we should keep working out. And we have worked on your food and eating and you are so getting that. You aren't on a diet. You are not "forbidden" anything. We cut out chemicals and processed food and we eat protein and veggies and fruit and you get a carb in the morning and other carbs at times. But your carb is roasted potatoes versus potato chips. And you know I am fine with the occasional cookie or ice cream or cake because you can do that in moderation and as long as you are doing everything else right...it's not a big deal to treat yourself every once in a while. Look at what you ate over the holidays. You LOST a pound and a half. You ate cookies and cheesecake and ice cream and even some potato chips here and there but you stuck to our frame work and you kept your exercise steady and you LOST. I am so proud of you by the way.

If you exercise and eat right, your body is going to do what it's supposed to do. It may end up curvy or it may end up lean or it may end up muscled and toned. But, let your body decide what it is going to do. Don't fight it. Don't argue with it. Don't force it to be something it isn't. That's what douche bag did to you. Don't continue to do it to yourself.

We lift. We run. We eat clean. And then we are what we are and we are happy with that. And you end up looking like you. And other girls will cut out pictures of you and want to be like you.... What do you think?

I thought he was right. And I told him so.  It took such a tremendous amount of weight off my plate suddenly.

And, he says, men will love you for how beautiful you are because beauty is here (he lays a hand on his chest) and not in your hips or thighs or boobs or curves or lack there of.

Trust me, he says.

And, I do.